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Stop Complaining and Just Do It!

Stop Complaining and Just Do It!

This saying has been used over time by parents including mine, myself as a parent, coaches, teachers, and bosses. The scripture I would quote to my children on a routine bases can be found in the New Testament book of Philippians 2:14-15 (NLT) that states “14 Do everything without complaining and arguing, 15 so that no one can criticize you. Live clean, innocent lives as children of God, shining like bright lights in a world full of crooked and perverse people.” Complaining is one thing I can do well. I sometimes find myself making excuses and complaining about all sorts of issues. It creeps up in me and I go back to the verse I quoted my children to check myself.

 One of the main complaints I hear is from friends who complain about the complaining on Facebook. I have hidden people from my profile so I would not have to see their constant negative post. Everywhere I find myself from online, in my community, television, online media and yes even family seems to be baptized with a complaining culture. It creeps back into my spirit. So, my goal is to stop complaining and just do it. 

How Was My Mind and Spirit Changed?

 

 

My friend Lance gave me a great reason to reexamine my mind and spirit. Let me introduce you to this amazing man. He lives daily with the reality of being in a wheelchair. He was born with spina bifida. Spina bifida is a condition that is from birth which the Mayo clinic states, “occurs when the spine and spinal cord don’t form properly.” Lance at a young age used crutches to get around as well as a wheelchair. He was bullied, harassed and told all his life by others he could not be “normal” in society. Lance proves them all wrong to this day. The picture is Lance in his first marathon. He wanted to be in the race but did not own a racing chair. He raced in his normal, daily chair. Race officials told him it had never been done. He finished the race. He did it! Lance did not complain about the racing officials or his lack of proper equipment, he just did it. It is what he does to this day.

Changing the Way I Think

I want to be like Lance. Stop looking for the reasons I can’t do something or complain about why it is hard. I want to just do it with a determination and drive that proves I can overcome and succeed. Lance is a bright light of inspiration in a very dark world. Coaching has helped me view my life in a more intentional way. Questions I ask myself might be:

  • Why am I complaining about this issue?
  • Does complaining change anything about it?
  • Do I have a right to complain?
  • What if I change the way I looked at what I was complaining about?

When I ask myself these questions, I focus beyond the circumstances, and look at the possible success that I can take advantage of. Instead of living among the everyday darkness of complaining, whining, and arguing; I choose to think about being an over comer, a bright light of inspiration and motivation. I choose to just do it and go against the grain. Coaching brings clarity and focus to the issues we might be complaining about and helps plan to overcome and succeed. Complaining is traded in for success. Nike chose the slogan for a reason, Just do it!

 

Written by Mary Rector

Master Coach, Life Coach

Overcoming Fear: Discovering Your New Normal

Overcoming Fear: Discovering Your New Normal

J. Oswald Sanders in his book Spiritual Leadership writes,The person who sees the difficulties so clearly that he does not discern the possibilities cannot inspire a vision in others.

Do you see difficulties as possibilities? Most of the time I don’t! Fear is a powerful feeling, so I think it’s important to ask, “Why am I afraid?” Is it the fear of failure? Shame? Fear of not having control? Great leaders discover ways to push past fear, discover new possibilities, and inspire a vision in others!

I would lie if I told you I have found the secret to overcoming fear. I still get afraid. Taking risks is a major part of life and business, but we often fail taking the daring next step. There are a few ways that have helped me overcome my fear.

1. Faith. I am a Christian, and my faith gives me confidence and my identity. I believe faith plays a crucial role in our lives. I could not overcome my fears without the person and work of Jesus Christ in my life. You may not be a Christian or a person of faith, but in my experience, faith drives me to confidence in my decisions.

2. Mind Change. I had to (and still do) shift the way I see risks and challenges. I started to realize I was afraid of losing control (or the perception of control). I started to transform my thinking from failure to freedom. I created spaces in my environment to fail. I love what Michael Jordan said, “I don’t remember every win I had, but I do remember every loss.” I had to see my losses as opportunities to get better.

 

 

3. Accountability Team. This is so important. I have a team of people I do NOT work with that holds me accountable and motivates me. Fear is crippling, but when you have a small intentional community of people motivating you-you will move forward. This is why people hire coaches! They want someone who can directly invest in them, and motivate them to move forward.

4. Developing & Empowering Others. The greatest calling for the leader is to develop and empower others. One of the greatest ways to reduce fear in my life is to develop and empower others to lead. By developing and empowering others, I am naturally instilling trust to take new risks. Leadership is influence, and being a genuine leader means being vulnerable. It is okay to take risks, and moving past fear is often a team effort.

We all face fear in different ways, but it can leave us crippled. Don’t let fear control you. Find the root of your fear, and push forward! I continue to be stretched by my faith, creating mind change, having a strong accountability team, and developing and empowering others. Overcome your fear by seeing difficulties as possibilities. Give yourself space to fail, and grow from those challenges. Find your new normal by inspiring vision in others by leading past fear.

 

Written by Jonathan Rector

Executive Leadership Coach

Jon@coachrector.com